So, I made the mistake of showing the following video to Monkey Boy recently, and he was all ‘Oh PLEASE make this for Valentines Day, Mum! You could totally make it! Go on, it will be SO yummy!’

And you know, it’s kind of flattering for him to think I could make this time consuming, complicated dessert, it really is. But he is way, WAY, overestimating the patience I have to spend in the kitchen, or most places, actually. And this time consuming, complicated batch of NINE cookies that look like something the Nyan Cat dreamed about after eating a large cheese pizza would be eaten up in about 30 seconds, and I would just cry. That much time and effort deserves to be put in a glass case for ever and ever so everyone can admire it.

So I made these ‘Valentine’s Day Apple Tarts’ instead, and they where devoured in 15 seconds, and we where all happy.

Apple Tarts with Cinnamon Cream


  • 1 sheet of puff pastry, thawed
  • 1 tablespoon of milk for basting
  • about 4 apples, or a mix of pears and apples if you are short of apples
  • quarter of a cup of sugar, I used raw organic but any kind would work.
  • Whipped cream, about one litre
  • sprinkle of cinnamon, or ‘apple pie spices’ 
  • Peel the apples and pears, dice them into smallish dice, about 1cm. Place in a saucepan with a the sugar and a few tablespoons of water over low heat. Add some cinnamon or spice mic now if you like.
  • While the fruit is softening, place the puff pastry on a tea towel, and using a heart shape cookie cutter, cut as many hearts out as you can. I made about 12. If it’s not Valentines Day feel free to use any cookie cutter you please. A shamrock for St Patrick’s Day? A Bell shape for Christmas? A Star shape if your darling got a great report card? A plain circle or square shape because it’s just an apple tart not a cause for a celebration for fucks sake? What ever you like. 
  • Place the puff pastry shapes on a lined baking dish and bake in a hot oven for 5 to 10 minutes, until puffed and golden.
  • While that is happening, whip the cream if you need to.
  • To assemble: Place a heart or two on a plate, use a knife to open it up halfway. Place a spoonful or two of the apple mixture inside the heart. Dollop on some cream and sprinkle with cinnamon or spice mix. 
  • Present to happy children. 
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